49 Approaches in 7 Days


Last month I completed the 7:7 Daygame Summer Challenge put out by Tom Torero of Daygame.com. The challenge was to approach 7 women per day for 7 days straight, for a total of 49 approaches. I didn’t follow this exact format, doing more than 7 approaches some days and less on others, but still totaled 49. I’d been way out of practice for day gaming, having only done a handful of approaches in the preceding several months, so it was an eye opening experience for me. The main reason I’d been taking it easy it that I met a great girl through day game and had been happy dating her for a while. I knew that my skills would atrophy though and having just started meeting women this way in earnest last year, I didn’t want to get rusty. I posted a long comment at the end of the post for the challenge so I’m including it below in it’s entirety:

This was a big challenge for me, but I persevered through thoughts of quitting to push myself to 49 approaches in 7 days. I had 150+ day game approaches under my belt before I started, but they were spread out over the past 10 months and sometimes I’d go several months with only a few approaches (becoming complacent while dating girls I’d met through day game). I got my start in day game in Poland also, so I had to calibrate my approaches to a diverse array of girls here in Northern California. Poland (Warsaw in particular) is home to much more beautiful and feminine women than the SF Bay Area.

By the end I’d gotten 4 numbers total, from girls in the 7-8 range. This was less than I expected, but I’m looking forward to dates with a cute Iranian, beautiful Afghan girl, sexy Bulgarian and captivating black girl from L.A. I think I was less successful than I hoped because not all of the girls were “my type”. I only approached cute women, but as Krauser has talked about, certain girls give you a reaction in your DNA. 3 of the 4 numbers I got were these types of girl. At a subconscious level you push yourself harder with these women, and end up being more successful than with a girl that is pretty, but doesn’t draw you in like a magnet.

Out of the 49 girls about a dozen told me they had boyfriends, but even about half of these “hooked” and we had great interactions, just no # close.

Lessons I learned:

-don’t gesticulate with your hands early on, and don’t break eye contact, draw her in with your eyes, the first 10 seconds are key (thanks Jon, Sam and Yad)

-if you don’t approach regularly, you will get rusty. If you make the excuse that you’ll only approach women who are your “type”, you’ll be too unprepared to make the best impression possible on the women you want most. I’ll be following Tom’s maxim from now on “an approach a day keeps the anxiety away”

-my area (~100,000 residents), even with several popular shopping districts, is not a high traffic area with many approachable, single women. I have to now push my comfort zone to approach pairs, women in shops, seated women, etc. if I want to interact with the greatest number of attractive women

-I’ve become an expert at identifying engagement rings on women I wanted to approach, I probably saw a kilo’s-worth in the past seven days. It’s hard to believe these women are all worth it, made me glad I wasn’t the fiancee.

Thanks for the challenge Tom. My approach anxiety has never been this low. I won’t let myself get that rusty again. I’ve done more approaches this past week than in any given month in the past year. I’ve learned a great deal about myself and what it takes to attract beautiful women. I’m looking forward to using these lessons to continue growing. Cheers.

One more thing I’ll add is that I ended up approaching two girls twice by accident! It was no big deal to me and I didn’t realize until they said “didn’t you come up to me a few days ago?”, but it goes to show how your environment can limit your options. I live in a medium sized city in California, next to a university, so while the greater metro area has 5+ million people, you don’t get a huge amount of street traffic and targets. Wondering if you’ve already approached a girl that you’re you notice is cute is lame to have in the back of your mind, but just more motivation for me to get back to Warsaw…

  • Sean

    I enjoyed reading this post man. I myself also agree with the day game philosophy. I need to put myself through this challenge soon.

    • http://patientambition.com/ Nick

      Thanks man. Once you get over the initial hurdle of approach anxiety you’ll begin to develop your own style. Start with just asking for the time or directions, then you can start leading with simple compliments and go from there. Strong body language and confident/honest statements, based on your observations are very powerful

  • Bodi

    Good work. I used to do challenges like this a lot, actually I did one last year where I went to Prague and did 100 in 4 days. It’s totally gruelling but worth it.
    Your volume is very low, with 150 over 10 months but if you’re getting results that’s all that matters….

    • http://patientambition.com/ Nick

      You’re right, my volume is low, but now that I’m back in Warsaw I’ll have more opportunities and motivation. The pattern for me has been to do a lot of approaches in a short period, find a girl that I like and date her, then not approach for a long time. I’m content for a while, but then I want a new challenge.

      Your Prague experience is a reminder that a large volume of work in a short period is worth the huge amount of feedback you quickly get. I’m midway through Nick Krauser’s new book and I’m starting to recalibrate my game to get better and more consistent results. It all starts with the approach.